BradenRathmell

Phony Food by Holden Caufield, food critic Every Saturday at Pencey Academy the phoneys behind the scenes serve us a steak dinner. They really do. This fancy meal is spearheaded by the 'delicious' steak. The food here at Pencey is already choppy at best, but this takes the moldy old cake. The steaks are hardly large enough to feed a human being. Not to mention they're hard as hell. You can't even cut the things most of the time. You really can't. They don't taste very good at all. Kinda like eating old dirt.
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Acompanying the black steaks are some mashed potatoes. Lumpy as hell, these side dishes aren't any good. They really aren't. It kills me. They even try to feed us their phony idea of dessert. The brown betty they try and shove down are throats is never actually eaten. A few brave souls do try it, but they're morons. They really are.

The reason the people running this place have a reason for feeding us this crap. It's not what you think. You think its so we can have a nice meal after a long week. But it isn't that. Its so phonies like old Thurmer can get in better with your parents. When your dear old mom or pop show up on Sunday, they'll ask you what you had for dinner last night. When you say "steak," they don't question the schools nutritional system. Its all a big phony plan to keep your parents out of old Thurmer's business. Its a big pile of bull.

Songs [] [] [] The first song is named after Holden himself. It talks about a guy who gets really lazy and quits things. It says something about wanting to stand up but always sitting down. Holden complains about phonies but never does anything about it. The next song title is ironic because the song implies that teen spirit is low. The song relates to the book because Holden has no real spirit in anything himself, except hatred in phonies. The final song is actually written responding to the first. Holden is also in the title. These lyrics seems like what Holden would say, so i think he would like the Screeching Weasels.
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