Chris+Kiefer's+Wiki


 * __ TOP 3 THREATS TO PENCEY PREP __**

#3: PHONIES People these days. I can’t believe how fake they can be. They’re all goddam phonies! There are very few people in the world that are real. One of which is myself. Everyone needs to stop messing around in other peoples’ business and live their own life. It drives me crazy. I swear, it’ll be the death of me.

#2: NO GIRLS One of the biggest problems I have with Pencey is the absence of females. I’m going crazy over here. All the phonies at our school get the girls, like Stradlater does. But, us real men are in a bit of a predicament. I need some goddam women in my life. If we don’t start accepting girls at our school, it will become a bigger problem and more problems will stem off of it. But, there is a simple solution; bring girls to Pencey.

#1: NO MILK People these days, taking my goddam milk and not telling me about it. THAT PISSES ME OFF. I can’t believe anyone would be so goddam selfish and all. If you finish my milk at least tell me about it before it’s too late! There’s nothing worse than pouring your cereal in the bowl and discovering the absence of dairy in your fridge.